Christmas can be an upsetting and isolating time for those who have lost a loved-on, and it may be that you don’t know how to spend the holidays surrounded by those who see Christmas as a time of joy. You may have put off any thoughts associated with Christmas, however, to limit your feelings of sadness, stress and guilt, plan the festive period ahead of time – whichever way you would like to. Here are five ideas that might be helpful to you when thinking about how to spend the holiday.
Arts and crafts can be used in a number of ways to remember a loved one. Making or buying personalised Christmas ornaments, a wreath in their memory or even creating a recipe book of your family member's favourite recipes that they cooked around Christmas time, are all helpful in using your creative side to introducing new traditions to remember your loved one.
Attend a Remembrance Service in their memory - these are often held by Churches and local community groups. Connecting with other people who may also be struggling with the time of year and who have experienced similar losses can be extremely comforting as well. If you would like information about Willow Burn's 2023 Light Up a Life Service, please get in touch to be added to our mailing list for this service: anglish@willowburnhospice.org.uk
At Christmas time, many people like to give back to others; this can be done through volunteering or donating to homeless shelters, animal rescue services or care facilities such as hospices. If your loved-one was especially charitable, then it is very uplifting for you to do this in their memory.
Often it is underestimated the impact that fresh air can have not only on the physical body, but on the mind as well. The calmness and serenity of walking can be paired with choosing your loved-one’s favourite route and can be a great activity to do either as a family or alone to reflect on your thoughts. Whichever way you feel comfortable with, fresh air is extremely beneficial to your overall mental health and allows emotions to flow naturally.
The last idea is a mix of smaller things you can do if you aren’t up to doing more strenuous activities on the day. Instead, you can raise a toast for your loved-one, or listen to their favourite Christmas songs or even leave an empty chair at the table and light a candle for them. Any small activity that brings comfort and love into your household is one of importance and so could become a tradition for you and your family if it helps you.
Anything that you can do in memory of your loved-one at Christmas is helpful to processing grief and so should be chosen based on what you feel is right and appropriate. Even if you decide not to do anything particularly special or change what you do year upon year, by simply remembering your loved-one it brings strength to you and others during a special time of year.
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